Free to be me!
Why me?
Why can’t I be free?
Free from what makes me sad!
Why can’t I be free?
Free to be next to what makes me happy!
And when I go to find my happiness, I go down that very road.
And when I come to the bend, I turn the corner and find my friends.
P.S. my sadness ends!
October 12, 1978 Age 14
Another poem about childhood struggles. I was feeling very lonely at this point in my life.
Julia Ann Ferguson
Tags: friendship, happiness, sadness
Love of Narcissism
Look at her face.
Smooth as silk, soft as cotton.
Her hair is gold, her eyes sapphires.
Rose petal lips, dainty hands and fingertips.
Glossy teeth, sweet beneath.
Isn’t it nice to know mirrors never lie?
1978
School assignment for an English class. We had to describe a personality trait or characteristic and of course I did it in poem form. I thought I was being so clever with the title.
Julia Ann Ferguson
Tags: childhood, Narcissism
JM – JF
Days of old
Scars afflict the girls’ mind.
Thin eggshell skull,
Cracking with childhood memories.
Sweat drips from a monsters brow.
Blood, boiling in the veins.
Seeping through the ever aging lines
On a Childs hands.
Hollow eyes sink into the swamp
Of fear and corruption.
Thoughts gasping for air,
Wind blows through her distilled mind.
12/31/80 age 16
Inspired by Jim Morrison. His music, my pain. I expressed my emotions mostly through poetry and coped with drugs and alcohol.
Julia Ann Ferguson
Tags: abuse, childhood, coping, depression, Jim Morrison, pain
Black
Black is the color of the bottom of a deep silent puddle,
Or the background of a midnight moon.
It creeps in on you when death is near,
And it surrounds you when you’re blind or can’t hear.
Black is the color you think when you’re all alone.
Black is where monsters live,
It’s where I don’t dare go!
Black has many feelings which we all express.
Black stands out from all the rest.
I like black best!
05.05.78
A poem I wrote in school. We were to pick a favorite color and explain why we liked it. Of course mine was in poem form! If you notice most of the examples are dark or scary – this poem actually shares how sad I was when I wrote it.
Julia Ann Ferguson
Tags: black, depression, fear, sadness, safety
My poems….by Julia
Look! What was that? Imagination.
Yes? Noooo nonono!!
There it goes again. Back and forth.
What is it?
Squiggles, circles, spinning round and round.
Stars and stripes jumping,
Dancing, screaming, SSSSSsssss!
A duck on a lake.
Peaceful, calm, tranquility, rest.
Sleep my mind, till I wake you tomorrow.
1978
Age 13. I included this poem as written in a journal. Sadly most of my earlier stuff was lost in journals I didn’t keep.
Julia Ann Ferguson (Ann without an E but I so badly wanted an “E” because I love Anne of Green Gables books)
Tags: childhood, imagination, insomnia, restless thoughts
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Julia Ann Ferguson Andriessen.